At age 31, Ate is undergoing On the Job Training—not from her field of discipline but an OJT for being a mother. For almost 3 months now, I’ve been observing how the arrival of Robbie changed her lifestyle and philosophy.
Growing up in a small family, I’ve known my Ate as a smart but “neutrally-active” student. She has been a consistent part of the honors class from grade school to high school (something I wasn’t able to do). Probably because during our formative years Papa wasn’t around, we grew up closer to Mama. Aside from this, having an absentee father for a long time (my first memory of Papa was when I was in grade 2 when he decided to stop going to Saudi and stay with us for good) somehow turned her to a stiff, strong, and at times deviant teenager.
When Ate wen to college at PUP, I noticed her “liberation”. As they say, college education opens you up to the realities of life. I remember a time when she shaved her head for no apparent reason.
After graduating, she easily got hired and resigned from them later on to shift to another company. Recently though, she has stopped from working because of her sensitive pregnancy. Since then, I’ve seen her transform from the deviant daughter to a diligent mother-to-be. And right after giving birth, from a liberated college student to a loving full-time mother.
As I observe them every day, I can’t help but compare the difference between her experience as a mother to that of teenage mothers. At her age, I can see that at some point she’s having difficulties pacifying my nephew (whose cry reaches at least four blocks from our house!). I have also observed the constant “motherhood 101” tutorial sessions given to her by Mama—bathing the baby, washing clothes, feeding, etc.
I would always tell Kay that Robbie is blessed to belong in two families that care for him and will try to give everything possible to meet his daily needs. We’re not rich but we see to it that he has everything that he needs from milk to diapers to vaccines. Unfortunately, not all babies are born in a family that can provide their needs and appreciate their presence.
The reality of over population and irresponsible parenthood haunts us as it creates more and more people who are mal-educated, if not uneducated. Whether we like it or not, population is a very big issue that the government needs to address. Sadly though, certain groups are very myopic, seeng only their immediate surroundings and not beyond the high walls of their posh subdivisions.
I am writing this neither because I’m righteous nor because I’m holy. In this short life that I’ve been living, I’ve had wrong turns; committed sins that have hurt people tremendously. But what I’m always thankful to God is the fact that I have a FAMILY and a COMMUNITY who didn’t and doesn’t condemn me for the nasty things that I’ve done. I can’t imagine what my life could’ve gone to, had I a family who is unsupportive and discouraging.
Looking back at my classmates and students who became mothers at such a very young age, I can’t help but think how they have survived the ordeals of parenting. I’m proud of them because they finished college and pursued a career. But again, not all teenage moms are given the opportunity to study and get a chance for a good life.
So do we have a population problem? Your age should help you answer.
